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Ninja Assassin


The biggest problem with Ninja Assassin is how bad the blood looks, and that's ultimately why I'm telling you not to see it, but we'll get back to that in a moment. The more important reason I'm telling you not to see it is because of the plot. I know what you're thinking and you're right... there isn't one. Even that isn't my problem. My problem is that they tricked me into believing that there would be a plot.

At the beginning of the movie we have this beautiful FBI agent conducting a rogue investigation of secret ninja assassin clans (hence the title). The plot seems to thicken as we learn that there might be a government conspiracy to cover up the existence of the clans for reasons that we don't yet know about. Her partner is a red herring throughout the movie as they try to convince you that he may be a part of the alleged cover-up and he becomes more and more suspicious at the story moves along... then... nothing. They completely abandon the whole idea of a government conspiracy without ever giving us any proof that there is none. So, really, there is no plot. There almost was one... and then it just vanished.

Now as for the blood. To be honest, I was slightly taken aback by the amount of blood and gore in this movie. I knew it was rated R, but I didn't think it was going to be as bloody as it was... I may have actually recommended it, strictly based on the action if it weren't so ridiculously gory, even with the writers false promise of a story, because it could have been fun.

Alas, no. You should not see Ninja Assassin.

1 comment:

Zombie Extraordinaire said...

Ninja Assassin is a movie that concentrates on chopping people bodies off. That's what I thought after watching it anyway.